Below I share my top 5 biggest mistakes with Christianity. Hereās a glimpse of my backstory.

On my 23rd birthday, my life was in shambles. After dropping out of a major university, I went back to my Midwest hometown, where I didnāt belong. To consider any alternatives seemed impossible. The grief from dreams ending took hold, and once winter arrived, I fell into a seasonal depression that I could not overcome. My lowest point.
As I scanned my lack luster apartment, I realized that my life was not moving in the direction I predicted. Feelings of failure deepened. Without a plan, I gratefully accepted a labor job and pushed through the day. Being raised to work hard, I found satisfaction with my job, but I knew it was short term. Hope never left me.
With the belief that I could conquer my depression and fix my situation alone, I approached it as a problem-solver. I went to the local library and found self-help books to teach me the secrets of personal growth. The books helped me increase self-awareness, but my depressive disorder didnāt change.
An Unexpected Fairytale
In autumn of 1992, I encountered the man of my dreams who took me to Florida, allowing me to escape the dreadful seasonal depression. I was living a genuine fairytale. Being madly in love among warm and favored surroundings was the medicine I needed for my heart and mind, but something remained missing.
Throughout the next two decades, I experienced an emptiness that made little sense in a successful marriage and a thriving technology career. As promotions increased, the hole widened. I describe this period as the wandering years. I searched for answers in every direction except the place I would become enlightened. My few attempts to read the Bible ended quickly before completing Genesis. Therefore, I looked for people to provide the answers.
Reflections
Upon reflecting on the wandering years, I find it worthwhile to share my key mistakes with others to help them avoid repeating these mistakes.
Many often say learning the hard way is necessary. Thatās not Godās statement. The Bible teaches us how to become Christ-like and holy. He never promises a perfect life without challenges. In Matthew 6:34, Jesus says that each day has its own troubles. Why add more?
Yes, we can learn from our mistakes, but If I could change a few bad decisions, I would. How about you? If I had known God and His ways in those critical moments, my action and decision would have been different.
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From birth, I attended a tiny church in a rural town nearby where I grew up. My mother ensured that we knew about Jesus and I attended Bible classes most Sundays. Surprisingly, I graduated high-school unaware of the possibility of building a connection with God. Iāve also learned that my soul and eternal life are my responsibility.
Hereās my top 5 biggest mistakes with Christianity:
Mistake #1 ā Relying on pastors and people exclusively to learn Godās ways. My number one biggest mistake was to take in human messages and interpretations without a firm understanding of Godās Word. Assuming a church is rich with scriptural teaching from the Bible, it is important to gain a pastorās shepherding. No question. To rely 100% on human understanding is a serious mistake. The finest pastors agree. The authentic ones will encourage you to verify their sermon message and learn who God is through direct prayer, Bible reading, and study. Remember, a pastor cannot create a connection to God for you and the pastor is not responsible for your soul.
Mistake #2 ā Not learning the Biblical Word of God in childhood. Itās possible to attend church during a lifetime and not connect with God. Among His teachings, we learn who God is and that we can build an intimate relationship with Him. It is absolutely crucial to understand the Bible as early as possible. There are childrenās Bibles and wonderful Bible-based studies to assist. Children need family Bible reading and prayer at home along with church. Brushing our teeth is a necessary daily habit, but not as important as the habit of reading Godās guidance for our lives. For the record, my mother provided BiblesāI chose not to read it. (The why doesnāt matter, I moved on š
Mistake #3 ā Prioritizing the worldview above Godās view. Itās impossible to prioritize Godās ways over worldly ideas if we donāt know Godās character. Pointing us back to #1 and #2. Itās easy to conform to acceptable sin when those around us are taking part. As believers, we are set apart from those who live by worldly standards. Always remember, His ways are not our ways and ignorance is a dangerous way to live.
Mistake #4 ā Living from my strength instead of Godās strength. We strive alone until we understand Godās ways and the concept of surrendering to His strength. On our best day, our strength is puny in comparison. When I forget and try to muscle through a situation, I stop and pray for Godās leading. We must submit daily to His power to experience the ultimate life. God provided unique talents, spiritual gifts, and strengths for us to accel in life. My Christian growth workshops help others understand the concept of Godās strength and how to unlock an individualās talents to align closer to God and His ways.
Mistake #5 ā Falling into the trap of religious politics. Iām referring to the world of Christian denominations. During my workshop trainings, I ask students to describe their relationship with God. Many of them respond with their church attendance record or associate their relationship as their church denomination. I understand. Once I learned Godās Truth about His ways, I recognized that my relationship with Him had little to do with religion or human inspired religious institutions. God established the church to become the body of Christ, not to replace Him as the answer.
By seeking the Lord directly, you will be shown the way. I am convinced that we need Him to teach, guide, and direct our steps. The human element, for me, is an add-on bonus instead of a replacement for God. Letās not dwell on our mistakes with Christianity. Instead, letās learn and act according to His ways to enlarge Godās Kingdom.
Are you more aligned with worldly ways, religious doctrines, or Godās ways? I encourage everyone to download a Bible app or buy a Bible book and get started reading scripture today!